Programming

This week had me thinking of all of the different things we are programmed to believe from a young age. We walk around absorbing everything as kids – judgments being a large factor in that.

We learn what is right and what is wrong in societies eyes, which is important right? We can’t have people thinking it’s ok to steal. However, we also learn such limiting beliefs about individualism and beauty. I mean, I grew up when Cindy Crawford was The Super Model. There’s no competing against that. It’s a huge reason plastic surgery is even a thing.

I have daughters – I would never want them to alter themselves surgically in order to feel better about the way they look. They are beautiful just how they are! It’s really more of a mental and emotional thing. Breaking away of those beliefs – Creating new beliefs for ourselves. That is the case with any programming. We have to break the cycle at some point and it should be now.

Then there are things we pick up as we go through life, even as adults. I realized one night that I had been programmed from past relationships to resist correcting, or pointing out when they were doing something wrong. Something as simple as telling My Love he had his brights on still when there was a car coming, gave me anxiety. I literally wrestled with myself about saying something. Not because My Love has ever bitten my head off for correcting him – absolutely not – in fact he thanked me. It was because at least a couple of people in the past reacted really badly and in cases yelled at me for it.

As an adult I can clearly see how asinine that is, how inappropriate their reactions had been, but I spent so much time in my 20’s biting my tongue that it almost became second nature and therefore now I second guess myself at times. No one enjoys getting yelled at or talked down to. We are all human, we all make mistakes, and poor choices at times.

By the way…if any of you are in a relationship like that – just get out. A person who truly loves you will not yell at you for pointing out something like that. There is definitely a level of respect missing there. Chances are they have some personal work to do in order to be their best self and not take their shadows out on you. Them doing the work is all up to them though.

The personal work we all have to do is all up to each of us as an individual. Break through the preconceptions. Break through the limiting beliefs, leave the past in the past and don’t allow what a person or people have done to you or how you were treated in the past have an effect on you now. This isn’t easy, but the work needs to be done to move past it. Triggers will always come up – it is a part of life, but it is how you deal with them that matters. Don’t ignore them, instead recognize them and do the work so that they don’t reoccur.

Much Love,

J.S. Wik

P.S. If you haven’t signed up for my newsletter yet you missed out on a big reveal! Sign up for my newsletter today! As I am working on my book – which has now become a series, you will then be the 1st to know EVERYTHING, from a sneak peek of the cover to the Character’s names. As the release approaches I will be doing a giveaway to those signed up! So Sign up today!